It’s the last Sunday in October. It feels like only yesterday I was excited because the month of Halloween was here! October 2019 has been good to me. There have been some dumpster fire days but for the most part it’s been amazing.
At my last appointment with my therapist we talked about making an effort to make myself happy more. So I am trying to figure out what this looks like exactly. As a Mom and a spouse, so much of yourself goes into making sure everyone else has what they need and are happy. This makes me happy, but what else..and should I expect these ‘things’ that make me happy, to make me happy all the time? I am learning to be more realistic with my expectations. Of course they won’t. They can help though.
I’ve been thinking a lot lately about being a creator and my expectations for putting content out there. I Tell myself, keep it fun. It should be fun. The online community though has this unintentional way of being competitive with stupid algorithms and whatever other calculations they throw in there. You
hustle hustle hustle, push out content, you’re happy with it, you love it..but what expectations are there? Almost ghostlike, it shifts from being fun to being work, and for what? Recently I had a good friend inbox me like, thank you, if I can support you in any way, let me know where and how. That meant so much and honestly, the relationships I’ve built with people are what keep me pushing. I want to chat with people. I want to discuss things with people. I guess in some weird way I am just hoping for something amazing to out of nowhere fall into my lap. Hah! isn’t everyone though? Like I’m waiting for some sign that I’m meant to keep going so hard.
In the beginning of the month my reading was very October theme focused. I was reading and loving paranormal romances. I read a few five star reads. Overall, it was great to immerse myself in reads that were a bit darker and atmospheric. As expected though, I became very antsy for some holiday romances. My stack of them began to get a bit out of control and knowing Nonfiction November would be coming, I wanted to get a jump start. I don’t regret it one bit. Holiday romances have a way of cheering me up unlike any other subgenre. They are so cozy, warm, sweet and romantic.
Last night I watched Hallmark’s film adaptation to one of the holiday romances I’ve read recently, Christmas Wishes and Mistletoe Kisses by Jenny Hale and I’ll be honest, I had to sleep on my thoughts about the adaptation. Initially, I really felt some kind of way because it felt like Hallmark changed so much of the movie and I didn’t understand why. I still kind of don’t..the book is perfect the way it is, but in the end the movie still ended up being okay. I felt like with the changes, the chemistry between Abbey our heroine and Nick, our hero was a bit unbelievable in the movie but it was still an alright movie. Obviously you can only fit so much from a 300+ page book into a 2 hour movie. I guess secretly I wish they would’ve stuck more to the book. I didn’t really see the value added in the switch ups they chose.
Any way, I would love to know what’s going on with you. How your October has been. If you had a five star read this month, let me know what it was in the comments. I am thinking of doing Vlogmas over on Youtube, so if you have any videos you’d like to see, let me know!!